Gods destroy church, proles unfazed

Lady Lake, Florida - Quoteth the AP

The Lady Lake Church of God was demolished, its pews, altar and Bibles left in a jumbled mess. The 31-year-old, steel-reinforced structure was built to withstand 150-mph winds, the Rev. Larry Lynn said.

By daybreak, parishioners gathered amid the ruins, hugging each other and consoling Lynn. They planned to clear the debris and hold Sunday services on the empty lot.

"That's just the building. The people are the church. We'll be back bigger and stronger," Lynn said.

---

Thor was avaliable for comment, but most of which was summarized into churches being excellent lightning rods and tornado fodder. The parishioners are widely expected to return to their homes later in the day to partake in the worship of the pigskin, whose temple was not destroied in the storms.